This isn't 'Nam, there are rules.

Have you ever wondered what other people see in their Facebook News Feed?  Well I am now giving you that chance. As Walter Shobchak once said, however, "this isn't 'Nam, there are rules."

Here are the rules:

1. Everything in this post will come directly from my Facebook News Feed, in the order that I see it.
2. I will only type what my friends have actually posted, with no mention of comments or likes.
3. I will not include pictures, memes, or links.
4. I will include article headlines only when the person posting introduces it.
5. This would be an example of Rule #4:  and the headline would go here.
6. Each status will end as it is punctuated on my page.  No punctuation means I will start a new paragraph.
7. Yes, this is in paragraph form.

These rules are hard and fast, so I will most likely break them.  Here we go!

Start:  Tuesday, May 1. 7:32 PM

Its May Day comrade. Grab a hammer and make yourself a sickle.
So uh, anyone want to loan this guy a snazzy suit jacket for my presentation Thursday? I can repay you with lame jokes, terrible puns and the humor known as my day to day life. Ruining your childhood, one picture at a time. I'm more Metal than you again :)
uh... "The Wookie Melt. Caramelized Banana, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, Sweet Cream Cheese, Crispy Battered to a golden Wookie brown. Coated in rich chocolate and peanut butter cake batter and covered with toasted Coconut. Mixed Berry Preserves for dipping." it sounds so disgusting but so good at the same time.It's funny how a melody sounds like a memory ♥
Good to know...?
Fund meals for homeless vets at www.TheVeteransSite.com. Naviocom Hitmen 1-0. +24 run differential .... ;(
Finally flying Old Glory. That's when a house becomes a home. Almost done with writing class. Then I only have to grade a million reading quizzes/homework, and then I'll be done! And then I might die. I believe String Theory still allows me to say 'happy birthday' and be punctual. So happy birthday! Glad you're back. Maybe some Chicago meet ups this summer. Also, has anyone ever told you you've got great initials? Hey like this page i created so I can get an A in my public speaking class!
I could watch u forever....
I hear you're going to Russia. First bit of advice. Endear yourselves to the natives. Music is the universal language, no? This song will help you in any situation. Need directions? Haggling in a market square? Bribing Kremlin guards those hookers were already dead before you arrived? All you need is this dulcet diddy, and you'll be everyone's favorite comrade. Hm, Pottermore may be open to everyone, and I may have registered. Let's see what this is all about. it's 2am, spending my last night at Candela singing karaoke with old and new friends. #Erasmusmemories
hahahahahahaha. If you try all 50 beers at the new bar in Columbus you get a free shirt and your name with a plaque on the wall...challenge accepted. Red Multiple Cups. ‎"Since you will all indubitably be visiting me in New Mexico, here are some of the amazing things we can do! Less than a month away :) "
if i don't get an A in this class because of blackboard, oooh i'mma be fuming. ‎18 more dayys!!! and they have zumba and yoga classes there at jail!?!?! go figure its like a freakin resort!! but with uh bars lol.. Hey Columbus peeps. I'm seeing Real Estate tonight. Can we pretend we were at the same show since its just separate by a day and then we'll be all "Can't believe the show right?" Congratulations to the cast of ONCE and our own Elizabeth A. Davis for her Tony nomination for Best Featured Actress in a Musical. The folks at the Case-Cleveland Play House MFA Acting Program are very proud of you. I'm addicted to that new car smell.
‎"I should run a marathon backwards so I could see what 2nd place look like" Brilliantjust so you know, "Paul Blart; Mall Cop" is even funnier when you can't move off the couch and just took 2 percocet. Just saying lol. I picked mine up today :)
And now a message from Mr. Lebowski to these "occupy" wannabe terrorists "THE BUMS WILL ALWAYS LOSE!!!!!!!"
The good ole days...Met your gorgeous sister at Phi Mu formal. She is just as wonderful as you.
Speaking of which...COME BACK??? Say something about this...awesome!

‎'Of what use are lens and light
To those who lack in mind and sight?'

I hate people that give off rude looks, if its that big of a deal that Im getting my Wic and it's taking longer than you would like, take your nasty face to a different line. I'm pretty sites there are 19 other lines you can go to. People are so ignorant.  i swear if i get anymore invites to stupid facebook games or requests from stupid facebook games. you will be unfriended im tired of all these damn notifications over stupid shit im never gunna play. so stop sending me shit. please and thanks. I know im not strong enough to be everything that im suppost to be. I give up. Im not strong enough.. ♥ ♥ Dr. Chura! A!!!

If you are going to use the sob story that your "car broke down and you never ask for money but you really need it this time" you better make sure you ask someone that you have not previously asked. Heading to Target-then I have a nice night in my King size bed reading Insurgent on my nook! Aw yeah! ‎Children's Miracle Network Hospitals just followed me on Twitter! Best. Day. Ever.

End:  Tuesday, May 1. 4:36 PM

So, I only linked to fund meals for homeless veterans and a children's hospital.  If I can do that every time I break a rule, the world will be a better place. 

Hope you enjoyed a look at what I get to see everyday. I know I love it.